Yoga Students
The Matriarch
The Matriarch is the Old Fart’s mate. She is a trillion years old. In class, she tisk-tisks under her breath, has an air of condescendence, interrupts the teachers with phrases like, "Well, the way I was taught...," gives the students “the look” if they try to save the teacher, and finally subdues the class into complete silence, including the teacher. Expect the teacher to stop verbalizing the instructions after the third or fourth pose when the Matriarch is in class. Everyone is intimidated by her.
Inner Dialog: Look at all these young bitches. Yea, so what that you're 50 years younger then me? So you have a tight yoga ass—big deal. At least I know what I'm doing. I’ve been doing yoga for 60 years. So what that my husband hates me. He's probably in the bar next door anyway. I better not catch his ass there. Anyway, let's see how good you are once we get started. What are you looking at? That’s right, this is the manual written by the CYO of the Nerd school. You know I'm going to give the teacher a piece of my mind if she starts doing stupid stuff with the poses. Yea, that’s right, Missy. Show off your tits in those fancy yoga clothes. That's right; I don't shop at the crappy GreatTrancendentalYoga Superstore. This unitard I've been wearing for the last 30 years is good enough for me. Screw your stupid sticky mats. This blanket is where it’s at. Hey, that guy with the gold chains has kind of a nice ass….
Next Student - The Really, Really Old Fart
Yoga Students
